Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Today's Musings Brought to You By . . . .

My warm snuggly bed!!! That's where I would like to spend the day, with my warm snuggly T-man by my side. I even told him he should play hooky and stay home with me today. Brrrrr, kids -- it's nippy outside. Of course, being the hothouse bloom that I am, anything below 60 degrees is too cold. There is a big reason I live in this part of the world -- very little winter weather. And today is the total opposite of yesterday, thank the stars above.

Be warned -- today's musings are EXTREMELY personal.

I beaded yesterday for HOURS. OH . . . MY . . . GOD! It felt like I had not done that in YEARS!! If this weird ADHD side effect doesn't settle down, I may well go truly crazy (as opposed to just make believe crazy). I printed the new pattern (wait til you see), gathered the beads, threaded the needle and away I went. And I don't even like to do peyote stitch! But I'll finish it up today, by golly. Of course, the question then will be "what now?"

There are so many things that have fallen by the wayside during the past two weeks, that I don't know where to go from here. I do not like this feeling of utter chaos hovering around my head. But life is rosy and there are no little aches and pains. So today's question is does the lack of pain, the feeling of lightness and the seemingly shiny day compensate for becoming Scarlett O'Hara and putting things off until tomorrow, because after all, it is another day? Those of you who have your own chemically rosy days, please feel free to offer up your own experience and suggestions. Inquiring minds want to know. And you can be anonymous in commenting.

My biggest concern is that this will affect my creativity to the point that it disappears. I am, after all, defined by that tiny artistic spark, or so it seems. I bead, therefore, I am, n'est-ce pas? I live to create and create to live. Put this into personal perspective: if someone came to you and told you that you could no longer do the one thing that you love to do in this world, no matter how hard you tried, no matter how much you desired it, what would happen to you? And yes, I'm probably being paranoid, or as T-man says, I'm looking for problems that aren't there. Maybe. I just must, being the creature that I am, consider the possibility so I can be prepared should that other shoe drop!

Let me hear from you on this one, rosy glasses or not.


Anonymous said...

Well T, I can relate. As you know I'm a little ADD and somedays a little DUH! And the question you ask is valid. I asked myself that same question when I was told that I had lupus. My hands had gotten to the point where I couldn't hold a glass of water with out using both hands. I had to ace-wrap my hand with a racketball in the palm of my hand in order to hold a spoon and feed myself. The reality was, I was losing the use of my hands. The days seemed to get longer, difficult, and more painful. For me, medication didn't work. I had to find alternatives that did work. The bright side to all of it is that I am blessed as you are with a loving and supportive husband and family that will not allow us to wallow. Like you, creativity is a large part of who I am. I made a choice to not let lupus define who I was to become. Not to see and end. To find another way to express my creativity. One day we will all be faced with that decision (let's face it the truth is most of us will not be creating art until our last day on earth.)So know I'll leave you with lyrics to ponder. These are from "A Chorus Line". The song is ..."What I did for love".

Kiss today goodbye,
The sweetness and the sorrow.
Wish me luck, the same to you.
But I can't regret
What I did for love, what I did for love.
Look my eyes are dry.
The gift was ours to borrow.
It's as if we always knew,
And I won't forget what I did for love.

So, my Dear, Beautiful, Strong, Loving, Amazing, and Creative Friend. Live with no worries. No regrets for what was, or what could be. We must live and love each moment for what it is. A moment in time. ( I guess there really is a song for everything :) ).


Anonymous said...

as I have heard somewhere quoted, "sufficient unto the day are the problems thereof". The human animal is very adaptable and you will find you will adjust to your changing body. My finding is that if one is creative, one is creative, no matter the limitations of the body. So don't borrow trouble; bead away.

Bead-Mused said...

Clara, you always hit the mark. And that is exactly the type of personal experience I was looking for. Thank you for that & more.

Carol, I am exceedingly glad & lucky to have you in my circle of friends. And thank you for shining a light to clear away the shadows.

Hugs to both of you!